Mouth Orgasm

That was my dinner this evening. That steak is about 15 ounces and almost an inch thick. An expensive cut of Delmonico Black Angus beef. How could I afford such a pricey steak? Well I have an interesting story about it.

Last night after work, I stopped off at Mugshots for a beer. I talked to my friend Steve and when we left I offered him a ride home, since he lives across the street from me. When I drop him off he says to wait a second because he has something for me.

He comes out a minute later with a Giant Eagle bag and inside was the pictured steak. I had completely forgotten about a discussion we had about every time he gets a safety incentive bonus he buys a big steak. I joked that I never buy good food for myself because it is too expensive, and he said that the next time he gets one he would hook me up. Well he actually remembered and definitely came through. That is what I call a good friend.

Around 4 p.m. I went over to the store and bought some stuff to go with it, plus some other groceries I needed. I got home and realized I do not buy anything to marinade the steak in, so I decided to use Italian dressing and various spices. After four hours I could not take it any long, I was starving.

I tossed it on my stove along with some Lipton’s beef noodles, which I forgot how good they are and how absolutely cheap. I need to pick up more of them to eat after work when I am starving.

Luckily, I have fantastic steak cooking skills and cooked it to a perfect medium rare. The steak was absolutely delicious. Each bite melted in my mouth. I ate the entire thing, even eating the very slim pieces of fat which were also quite tasty.

While it was cooking I went down to my wine cellar to bring up a bottle of red. I quickly realized that I hate wine, and I do not actually have wine cellar. I had to settle for the next best thing, chocolate milk. Wine snobs can go punch themselves in the nuts because my steak and chocolate milk was fantastic.

So in conclusion, I would like to thank Steve for the steak, my years of restaurant employers for the skill to cook the steak, and my own distinct taste for not wasting money on shitty wine.

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