Death to Pagans!

I was at work the other day (you know, the place that shall not be named) and had a fun experience with a customer. Since I cannot discuss any details of work, let me just say this, we have a product that is well known and loved, but during the Halloween period it alters slightly. This exchange happens at the cash register where I am ringing people out.

Guy: Excuse me, do you have any of the original product?
Me: Sorry, we had some earlier, but they sold out, all we have now is the Halloween product.
Guy: Well that is too bad because we love the original product.
Me: The Halloween product is basically the same thing.
Guy: As a devout Christian, I find it offensive.
Me: Oh, my apologies.
Guy: Apparently only us true believers in Christ can recognize and denounce pagan symbols. Not that you would know what I am talking about.
Me: Umm, what?
Guy: I am sure someone like yourself has no clue what I am talking about.
Me: Actually sir, I probably know a bit more about the topic than you do. I studied religion in college as part of my major.
Guy: Well whatever, I just find it appalling.
Me: Yeah, here’s your change.

I really wanted to lay into the guy, but I was at work and the people in line were all part of the same church group and I figured it would be bad to piss them off. Why did the dickhead think I was unable to comprehend his “dire” situation about paganism? This is why religious people should be banned.

He is the kind of guy who will get offended if someone says Happy Holidays. I should have told him that I was Jewish or Muslim. I bet the guy has no problem with Easter Bunnies and Christmas presents. What a self-righteous asshole.

I wonder how offended the guy would be with a picture like this?

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5 thoughts on “Death to Pagans!

  1. Ah, the good ol’ Smiley cookies. Who knew such an innocuous piece of baked dough could incur the wrath of self-righteous right-wing nuts. Personally, I find ancient torture devices offensive, but they seem to enjoy wearing them around their necks. I wish I was there. I would have laid into the guy for you.

  2. I find the term “smiley cookies” to be offensive to victims of depression. It’s a very common disease and just like society, our pastries should not discriminate against us. Please suggest “melancholy cookies” to upper management, thank you.

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