I went to see the doctor this morning. Seriously, what kind of doctor wants to make appointments at 8:00 a.m.? And what the hell was I thinking getting up that early? Whatever, I needed to go. Normally I would be too embarrassed to mention why, but I figure there is a mostly naked picture of me on here, what else could I possibly do or say that would be embarrassing?
The reason for this visit is a rash…on a very private area. And before any of you jump to conclusions, it is just a fungal rash! I know how sick some of you bastards can be. I have actually had it for awhile (two years) and it goes away with a little bit of cream. No big deal. It is not contagious or anything. Anyways, I realized the other day that I was about out of the miracle cream and did not have a prescription, which means a trip to the doctor.
One of the things the doctor told me was that I should switch to boxers instead of boxer briefs. I have not wore boxers since the 9th grade. So, after my visit, I went to Peebles (a highly respectable the only store in Philipsburg) and bought a pack of boxers. I am curious to see how it works out for me. It may drive me insane and I cannot be held responsible for my actions the next few days.
Speaking of Peebles, can someone explain why the hell they sell Geoffrey Beene pants and ties, yet they do not sell Beene shirts? For those that do not know, I mainly wear GB shirts to work. They are more expensive, but they hold up much better than Van Heusen or Stratford, plus they are more comfortable.
Sorry for that side tangent. Back to the doctor. While I was there the nurse made me step on the scale. Holy shit! 179.5. Right, basically 180. I am a fat bastard. Now, the doctor did say that the scale is heavy, plus I was wearing clothes, but still that might put me around 175, which is totally unacceptable. Do you know what this means? Me neither, but I will be sure to let you know when I figure it out.
You see that guy in the red shirt? I still have that red shirt, it is a small! I only weighed 150 back then and I was in great shape. I would take a picture and show you what I look like now, but I do not want to frighten anyone. Granted, I am almost 30 now and things are starting to fall apart, but come on, this is ridiculous. Radical lifestyle changes need to be made. Also, I wish I still had that hat…