I had a brilliant idea the other day. Before I share this brilliant idea, allow me to preface this post with a quick disclaimer: I am not a doctor, nor do I have any real knowledge about human anatomy, particularly the female reproductive organs. With that being said, I have figured out a way to help eliminate the blood shortage problem in this country. For those of you who gag easily, this post may not be for you.
Recently, Lindsey had her little friend over for a few days, and this is not the type of little friend who has a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow, if you know what I mean. Yes, I am referring to her period. Anyways, without sex for a few days, the brain is able to focus on more constructive things. I realized that it is such a waste of blood. Why not design some kind of tampon that saves the blood and you can take it to the Red Cross and deposit it into the blood bank.
I know, I know, this is really gross, but just hear me out. Since period blood is basically half a fetus (the unfertilized egg, whatever), it should be teeming with stem cells. I would imagine that if you get a transfusion from period blood, it would heal you almost instantaneously. I am sure there is some kind of science out there that backs me up.
As you can see from this photo, your old fashioned tampon is inserted into the vagina and then it does some stuff and a string hangs out. I guess it just absorbs the blood. I have no clue, I usually walk away when a girl tries to tell me about stuff like this.
Imagine the same basic concept, but more of a plastic tube, something like a test tube. It would have some tabs that go in first and when the girl removes it, the tabs automatically close.
I will leave it to the engineers and doctors to work on the details. I am no medical expert, but this sounds like a pretty sound idea. I do not even want money or anything, just the feeling I will get knowing that my idea is saving lives.
Here is a rough sketch of what my new and improved, life saving tampon would look like.
I expect a call from the Nobel people any day now…