After the Darkness

This is something new I plan on doing every so often.  I will take a movie and write about where they are nowadays.  No, not the actual actors, but the characters.  My blog, my idiotic ideas.

The Ghost and the Darkness
This is one of those movies I had not watched in years, I used to own it on VHS, but it never survived the conversion to DVD.  It was on HBO the other night and I had forgotten how good it was.  Let us take a look at what the survivors did after their battle with lions.

Colonel John Patterson
The man who killed the lion that ate his friend.  He finished construction of the bridge and moved back to England.  He ended up having three kids and he took them all over the world on hunting trips.

You may wonder where he got the money he would need to become a world famous hunter.  Well, in 1901 he opened a delicatessen in London, after a few years he had them all over England and even expanded into the United States.  Patterson and Sons Deli.  Even though when he opened it, he only had one infant son, he figured the name sounded like it was more established.

The unfortunate side of owning a deli, is eating all the meat.  John eventually became very fat and died of a heart attack.  His sons later sold the family business.

Robert Beaumont
The jerk who sends Patterson there with the mission to build the bridge.  Beaumont only had one goal:  to be knighted.  Well he never actually achieved that goal.  In fact, he was later murdered in his sleep by his new foreman.

His name was forgotten very quickly.  Men like him need to remember that being assholes does not get you very far.  It usually gets you a nice knife in the back.

After the bridge was completed, this man was sent by the British Empire all over the continent of Africa helping complete projects.  He became known as a great man of peace and of always being able to get the job done.

He later retired and became a huge speaker on Africa becoming a unified nation.  Even though he liked his job with the British, he wanted to see his countrymen united and controlling their own destiny.  He looked at the United States as a great example of how powerful a land can become when their people are one.

He never liked any of his wives, even though he took two more.  He died at the age of 94.

The shifty Arab worker who blamed Patterson for the lions.  He later moved back to Jordan and helped lead a revolt against the British government there.  He helped expel the British troops and he set himself up as the King of Jordan.

He ruled for 22 years before a coup d’etat ousted him from government.  Oddly enough, he was replaced by another Abdullah, whose family still rules the country to this day.

Charles Remington
The world famous hunter, who was killed by the lion after he killed it’s brother.  The man was the heir to the Remington gun fortune.  He had hunted everywhere in the world.  You name an animal, and he probably killed it.  Minus the platypus, he was deathly afraid of those freaky bastards. 

After being eaten, the lion most likely would have taken a nap and began digesting it’s kill.  Remington would then have ended up as this:

Before people go crazy and inform me that I have my history wrong, yes I am quite aware of this.  In fact, if you want to read something interesting, read about the real John Patterson.

2 thoughts on “After the Darkness

  1. Nice. You know, I was just thinking – you know what would make my day complete? A picture of a lion taking a big old dump. Thanks, Josh. 😉

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