Lindsey is a Higher Evolved Person

Lindsey is a terrible passenger in a car.  Seriously.  She will scream to you to watch out because she thinks you are about to hit the car in front of you, who is like a half mile away.  She has done this to me about five different times and each time I react the same way:  have a heart attack and slam on the brakes.

Well a few weeks ago she did this with her mom and when she came home she told me all about it.  She said that she did not understand why she thinks there will be a crash, but she gets a vision of the us slamming into the car.

Naturally, I had to mess with her.  I told her that she must suffer from a disease.  I explained that the frontal lobes of her brain must have fused together at birth and she is able to see into the fourth dimension.

I explain that she must be able to see the parallel universes that are in flux with our own.  Instead of us not hitting a car, she sees the universe where we do hit a car.  Her brain is evolved past that of normal people.

She is nodding and completely buying it.  Sadly, I felt bad and decided I had to tell her that I was messing with her.  I could not allow her to go around telling people her brain works in 4-D.

And yes, the only reason I am telling this story is because she just yelled for me three times while in the shower.  When I got up there, she was lying on the floor and told me that she was out of lotion.  What a goober.

Author: Ngewo