The Solution to the North Korea Problem



I know everyone is freaking out that we may have some kind of nuclear war. Trust me, that will most likely not happen. I mean, at worst, we lose Guam and South Korea. Maybe stop eating fish from Japan for a few years. Fortunately for everyone, I have a solution to the problem.

So I think most people would agree that President Trump does not really seem to like doing the whole presidential thing. In fact, I think there are only three things he really enjoys doing: enriching his family, spreading the Trump-brand, and golfing. Know who else enjoys golf? Kim Jong-un. Okay, I am totally making that up. But, his father shot a 34 the first time he every picked up a club. Yep, he was 38 strokes under par after 18 holes. I have read reports claiming that his son is just as good.

I propose that we set up a four round golf match between Donald Trump and Kim Jong-un. Toss in Vladimir Putin and Bashar al-Assad for good measure. If Trump wins, then North Korea must give up their nuclear program. If Kim Jong-un (which is his last name?) wins, they can keep their weapons. Obviously that will not be enough to keep either leader interested. So, we need to hit those other things that Trump loves. The match will be played at his golf course at Bedminster. I am sure that Putin and Assad are already members. It will be televised all over the world via pay-per-view. Winner gets 75% of the take. Also, if Trump wins, I think Kim should allow him to build a Trump Hotel in Pyongyang. If Kim wins, we will rename Guam–Glorious Kim Island. Also, he can be a lifetime member at Mar-a-lago for free.

Also, the loser has to shave their head. The world can only have one leader with crazy hair.